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Tears and Healing; The journey to the light after an abusive relationship
| by Richard, 21CP |
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Tears and Healing
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Books
Better get used to reading, because recovery takes a lot of it. And if you're still with your BPSO, you'll need a safe place to stash these books where they won't be seen!
If this list is too short for you, have a look at the compilation of everything I've read along my road to healing in my recovery library.
The images link to borders.com, except for the Al-Anon book. I have no connection with Borders or Al-Anon and receive no compensation. Please shop wherever you like.
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SWOE - this is the non bible. It is invaluable. In fact, I'm assuming you already are familiar with the basic ideas presented in it. |
| Getting the Love You Want, and Keeping the Love you Find
- by Harville Hendrix - Either of these books will help you understand what is
happening to you when you are in love - and I mean "head over heals",
"out of you mind", "can't live without him/her". Falling in
love is probably the most dangerous thing a non can do. Learn about it to escape
it's evil spell.
Keeping is the more detailed and can be worked by yourself. Getting requires both partners to participate if you want to work it. |
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The Road Less Traveled - by M Scott Peck - a classic book on spirituality and mental health. Use this book to understand what your spirit is telling you; and understand why you hurt so much. This book led me out of despair and into change. Read my review for nons. |
Codependent No More - by Melody Beattie - a widely respected tool to help you understand and correct the lack of personal boundaries. It will help you leave your SO's pain with them, and take responsibility for your own feelings.
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In All Our Affairs - Making Crises work for You - by Al-Anon - When you are really ready to face your true feelings about your relationship, I highly recommend this book. Don't be distracted by alcoholism, if your SO is not. It's the behavior and the feelings that count, and this book is right on target. This book made me cry more than anything else I read. |
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Struggle for Intimacy - by Woititz - This book helped me understand my wife and what was happening inside her. It is written for adult children of alcoholics, but guess what? It applies to anyone who grew up in a dysfunctional home. |
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Tao te Ching - translated by Stephen Mitchell - If you have a mind that thrives on abstract thinking, you will find much insight in this ancient Chinese view of the spirit and spirituality. The Tao has been the defining document for my own spirituality. This translation is very readable, and easy to apply - for the Tao. |
There are many, many books that can help you in your recovery. These are the ones that most helped me. Read everything that works for you.
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© 2004-6 Richard, 21CP and Dalkeith Press